Tuesday, July 7, 2020

A Couple of Life Lessons with Toxic Folks and How I Got Back on Track



Last month was so wonky for me. Do you ever have times in your life when you feel like the people around you are pulling you completely off your path? That happened to me not once but twice in June, and I am finally starting to feel like myself again.

If you're like me, you like to help and uplift those around you. And over time, you may find that certain people take advantage of that. I've gotten better over the years at being able to sniff out the rats who demand so much without giving much in return. You know they types--the leeches that do nothing but drain you without respect for your time and energy?

As life does, I was provided with two more lessons last month to see if I'd learned from last time, and the time before that, and the time before that. Even though I nipped both instances in the bud pretty quickly, it still stripped me of 3-4 weeks of my time and focus. That's time I'll never get back!

Because of what happened last month, I wanted to write a blog post about how important it is that we stay true to our goals, and tell everyone who is reading that that it is okay and even good to make our own dreams a priority. Everybody has different desires for themselves, and it's so damned easy to get sucked into someone else's plan! Before you know it, you're spending hours of your day, answering frantic phone calls and texts, spending time and energy on this and that to please these demanding people, and giving up your dreams to help the poor, needy ones, and you don't realize until you're absolutely frazzled, that they are draining you, until it's too late. 

The first instance I had to deal with was being roped into helping out someone for a non-profit organization. It was for a good cause, and I had the time, so I figured, why not? Well, there were a lot of red flags from the beginning, including the way this woman treated her employees (verbally abusive), and also the fact that she need to make some major changes to her operation, yet she didn't take advice well. She also had incredibly high turnover for her organization. I chose to look at her through rose-colored glasses. I told myself, "She has had a really rough life," but I also made a deal with myself that if she ever talked rudely to me, I'd bail. No matter what kind of upbringing you have, you still have a choice to treat people with respect. Well, it only took her a couple of weeks before she turned her temper on me, even though I was giving her lots of time and help--and for free! Rather than let it continue any longer, I decided to end it right then and there. I'd seen enough anyway, and I should have trusted my gut from day one. I quit the non-profit, and I also called her out for being disrespectful to me, which is something I would not have done in the past. In the past, I would have stepped out quietly without confrontation. So maybe that was something else I needed to learn that life was trying to teach me. 

The second instance was regrettably reconnecting with a family member after several years of being estranged. Everyone who has been in contact with her had warned me she was manipulative and toxic, but why would I listen to them? Well, I should have. After a few weeks of being back in contact, I found myself being drawn into non-stop drama. I really feel for this girl, but her life choices and drug and alcohol-addled brain had her constantly vying for my attention at all hours of the day. The whole thing completely distracted me from my goals and my life because I was too worried about trying to love her and fix her. I was spending hours each day talking with friends, trying to figure out what I should do next, and ultimately, if this person was playing mind games with me, when I should have paid attention to the red flags and returned my focus to my goals. I ended up initiating a confrontation, and the chaos has finally stopped. The line of communication remains open, but new boundaries have been set.

After dealing with both of those people last month and resolving them, I totally own up to being the one who gave them all that time and attention. People will only drain you if you let them! But now that I'm back on track, I feel so much better. I feel refreshed. I feel re-energized. And I feel like things are finally starting to move with some forward momentum with my own desires and dreams again.

Bottom line with this wordy post today is this: your time and focus is precious. Make sure you're not derailing yourself by helping needy people who have all kinds of red flags around their behavior. The healthy, good relationships in your life won't be so draining. In fact, they'll be energizing and help you move toward your dreams rather than drain you. They'll feel right and fun and light. 

Even though we are in a pandemic, it's still good to set boundaries for yourself. There will always be those who will want to take advantage of you, so even if you're a kind, generous person, remember YOU are worth investing your time in, too!

Hope you all have a good week!

XoXo

Scarlett

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Wednesday, April 29, 2020

Cover Reveal! THE NEON FISHNETS BOOK 2

I'm so happy to unveil the cover for THE NEON FISHNETS BOOK 2: BREAKING THE CHAINS, coming soon from Painted Hearts Publishing!





Follow this blog to stay tuned for upcoming release dates and other sneak peeks on the new release!



And if you haven't started the FF rock band romance series yet, THE NEON FISHNETS BOOK 1: PLAYING WITH FIRE is currently available on Kindle Unlimited!





Grab your copy today to get ready for the next installment!


XoXo

Scarlett


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www.scarlettknight.org


Wednesday, February 19, 2020

February 2020 Update

Hello, all! Valentine's Day has come and gone, and hopefully you've grabbed some of that 75% off chocolate and are enjoying the second half of Februrary.

I just wanted to do a quickie post to update you that I am hard at work on the second draft of THE NEON FISHNETS: BOOK 2! This one's told from Raina's POV, and it's been a wild ride spending time in that reckless rocker's mind. I'm crossing my fingers you'll enjoy this one as much as the first. My goal is to submit it to my publisher this spring.



image from pexels.com


In the meantime, if you haven't read THE NEON FISHNETS: BOOK 1, you can catch up to be ready for the sequel! Check out PLAYING WITH FIRE, the enemies-to-lovers rock romance that started the new FF trilogy, here:






Thanks for stopping by, and be sure to stay tuned for all the rockin' lesfic updates!




XoXo

Scarlett




Friday, January 17, 2020

Interview at Your Kinky Friends

Hello! We're already halfway through January; can you believe it? How are those New Year's Resolutions going? Given up on them? Or maybe you're still going strong?

I hope it's been a good month so far.

I wanted to do a quick post to share an interview that I did with Nicholas Tanek over at his website yourkinkyfriends.com. In it we chat about writing, we discuss what I'd like to see more of and less of in erotica, we talk about some of my favorite movies, and more!

Click the pic below for a link to the full interview!






And as always, thanks for stopping by!


XoXo

Scarlett


www.scarlettknight.org



Monday, December 30, 2019

Looking Back on 2019





It’s official! 2019 is coming to a close, and a new decade is around the corner! Looking back on the past year, there are some things I’m so grateful for. Here’s a short list of the highlights:



1) I released the first book in my very first FF romance trilogy, THE NEON FISHNETS, and was floored by how well received it was! It consistently stayed within the top 100 of Amazon’s Lesbian Fiction and Lesbian Romance categories and has been my most successful book to date. Thank you, readers!

2) I had my first ever audio book versions of a couple of my stories released. Such a fun milestone!

3) I connected with lots of wonderfully kind new fans of my work online. So appreciative of those of you who have reached out! I love hearing from you!

4) Not writing related, but I got to meet one of my long-time idols, the living angel Sarah Brightman. Unforgettable experience!

5) Also not writing related, I finally got to check out Deep Ellum, a beyond cool spot in Dallas that i’ve always wanted to check out, and which will appear in NEON FISHNETS Book 2!



Are there any noteworthy things you did in 2019? If so, please share in the comments!

Wishing everyone a great new year!


XoXo

Scarlett

Monday, October 14, 2019

"Last Minute Valentine" Now Available as an Audiobook!

Hello! I wanted to do a quick post to announce that my erotic FF short story "Last Minute Valentine" is now available to purchase as an audio book!





Cass is seriously bummed out that her boyfriend had the gall to confess to having an affair one week before Valentine’s Day. Now painfully single on one of the hardest days to be single out of the year, she reaches out to her good friend Jeannie for support. When Jeannie comes over to Cass’ apartment with flowers and chocolates, Cass is beyond pleased. She grows even more pleasantly surprised when Jeannie begins to hit on her. The truth is, she’s secretly had a crush on Jeannie for a while, but only now, as they take their friendship to a sensual new level, does she realise the feeling has been mutual.


Visit -->HOUSE OF EROTICA<-- for the Buy Links!!


XoXo

Scarlett



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Monday, September 30, 2019

PLAYING WITH FIRE Spotlight #3: Reunion Tower

This last Behind the Scenes Spotlight of THE NEON FISHNETS BOOK 1: PLAYING WITH FIRE highlights one of my favorite places in Dallas: Reunion Tower!






Reunion Tower is an actual place and one of the most eye-catching features of the Dallas Skyline. It was featured in the opening credits for the popular soap opera Dallas. I've had the pleasure of dining at the restaurant Five Sixty, which features a fantastic menu by chef Wolfgang Puck. There's also an awesome bar up in the tower called Cloud 9.


Cloud 9

One of the coolest things about the tower is that when you're at Five Sixty or Cloud 9, it rotates! But it doesn't rotate too fast, just at a nice leisurely pace, so you get a full view of Dallas down below as you're enjoying your food or drinks. There's also an observational deck where visitors can experience the view minus the food.

In PLAYING WITH FIRE, some of the band members visit the tower to have drinks at the Cloud 9 bar. I thought it would be a fun place to have one of the pivotal scenes in the books. As I'm a Dallas area resident, I have a lot of fun including real-life places in my stories. I also enjoy making up  fictional spots. But Reunion Tower is 100% real and worthy of a visit of local rock stars!








If you missed the first two Spotlights on PLAYING WITH FIRE, you can find them here:





Thanks, as always, for stopping by!

-SK

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